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Journal

Embodied Rituals for Skin + Soul

Filtering by Tag: New Years Resolutions

New Year :: the emergence of Light from Dark

Katie Gordon

This winter has been a time of deep introspection, exploration, and surrender for many of us. Becoming more acutely aware of old patterns, perspectives, and projections that no longer serve, and actually detract from, the path of Soul. One particularly powerful lesson of the last month for me has been in giving myself full permission to feel exactly what I'm feeling. Not trying to change, alter, redirect, invalidate or discount anything that comes up. And I'm noticing when I really allow myself to feel the full weight, it often shifts quite quickly. Not always, but often.

I used to deeply fear feeling the full heaviness, sadness, and darkness of whatever I was feeling because I worried I'd just keep sinking in. That it would never end unless I pulled myself out. That I would end up BEING whatever emotion it happened to be forever. This seems to be encouraged in many of our modern therapies. Reframing, redirecting, changing perspective, etc. Which I see the value in. But that approach also takes away so much power from our own souls in the way our inner Self teaches us sooooooooooo much via our feelings and our bodypsyche. 

What would it be like to love yourself so deeply and unconditionally, that you gave yourself full permission to feel and be with yourself in whatever feeling state happened to be showing up in the moment? What would that feel like? 

This time of year is full of words like "intentions," "resolutions," and "new beginnings." But as Marion Woodman writes in Dancing in the Flames"Intentionality in itself does not lead to an enlightened heart. It is better thought of as a way of giving meaning to experience. It is open to both conscious and unconscious information." Meaning, we need to be open to what is trying to come forth from our experience of life and not live by sheer power of will, which can often end up blocking what the unconscious is attempting to bring forth. There is an aspect of surrender in setting intentions for the year ahead. Surrendering to the deeper dimensions of our experience, surrendering to our dreams, to that which our souls are stretching toward.

Why I don't have New Years Resolutions and what I do instead...

Katie Gordon

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Maybe I just don't like doing what everyone else is doing. My inner rebel likes to do things differently. Maybe it's because I know myself well enough to know that when I've had NY resolutions in the past, they last for about a week. Maybe my resistance to New Years resolutions is something I should look at. Whatever the reason, since I was young I just decided that I don't do resolutions. To me, it can feel like we're telling ourselves, "you're not quite good enough the way you are, so these are the things we're going to work on changing this year." Don't get me wrong, I'm all for growth and development. It's just that resolutions typically sound like a list of things that we'd like to change about ourselves.

Jeff Brown, author of Soulshaping, posted this beautiful quote today:

"Sometimes we forget how far we have traveled. Good to acknowledge what it took to get this far, all those hoops we had to jump through, all those difficult overcomings. Good to stroke our face with love and remind ourselves how much courage it took to brave the journey. Good to say 'thank you' to the spirit that walks within and beside us, reminding us that we are simply and utterly worth fighting for."

This is what the new year is about to me. It's about looking at this last year, and 2013 was a doozy for me, and telling myself "Damn! Look at all the amazing things I did and learned!! How lucky am I to have received this love, these lessons, and to have been in communion with such beautiful souls. How can I expand on this moving forward and how do I want to FEEL as I do?" Because it's not about getting things done or losing that weight or reaching a goal. It's about EVERYTHING that happens through the process. It's about the way you feel in the moment and what that's reflecting about your soul and your journey.

I've noticed we have some resistance, consciously or subconsciously, to feeling at ease, in our flow, and allowing things to happen without pushing. We like to MAKE things happen. We RESOLVE that things should be a certain way, so we're going to do whatever we need to do to get that outcome. That we need to be busy, to be working, to always be doing better (whatever that means). This year has taught me that all that is SO overrated. When we're in our flow, letting things take their course, moving and acting from the way we want to feel in our lives...THAT'S when the magic happens. That's when our soul and our vision can move through us and things can be seemingly effortless. Don't get me wrong, it takes effort to show up, to do our own work, to be present. But when we make that effort, the Universe/God/Goddess/etc. conspires and synchronizes to bring to us exactly what is needed.

So instead of resolutions this year, I'm taking time to reflect on what I want to FEEL more of this coming year. I'm inspired by one of my mentors, Danielle Laporte, to think about what my Core Desired Feelings this year/month/week/day are, and what can I do in order to feel those CDF's.

This year I want to feel In Communion, Abundant, Playful, Flowing, Expressive, Sensual, Free. What are your Core Desired Feelings? How do you intend to grow, expand, allow, and show up in 2014?